Psychophant's Rants
27.6.04
Taxes
I know, a classical rant. But I will not rant about taxes. It may be purely a psychological question. But as the state automatically retains the amount of money that theoretically I should pay anyway, I never get the feeling that the money is mine. So when I fill up the forms, I am just looking for justifications to get the state to give me money.
No, what irritates me, as so many other things lately is myself. I mean, considering my simple fiscal situation, filling up the forms takes a couple of hours. And after I present it, in a couple of weeks, I will get over a thousand euros. Money that although it is technically mine, I had never considered so. So, in fact they are paying me my holidays, or a new computer.
A good reason to do that on a slow Sunday afternoon, and start planning what to do ith the money? No, it seems, as the deadline (after two months) looms close, and only a few days ago did I fill the draft (using the program they supply). Now I only have to pass the corrected draft to paper. Twenty minutes at most. Not yet. I am procrastinating. Writing on the internet instead of getting money.
Well, that could mean I do not really need money. Although more or less true at the day to day level, it certainly is not when we pass into the realm of big purchases, serious consumerism. And that money could afford me some attractive toys. Or pay this year's Amazon tab.
I do not know. I will finish now, to see if I find a pen to stop this circus. But I am sure I will do the same next year.
¶ 9:38 AM 0 comments
I know, a classical rant. But I will not rant about taxes. It may be purely a psychological question. But as the state automatically retains the amount of money that theoretically I should pay anyway, I never get the feeling that the money is mine. So when I fill up the forms, I am just looking for justifications to get the state to give me money.
No, what irritates me, as so many other things lately is myself. I mean, considering my simple fiscal situation, filling up the forms takes a couple of hours. And after I present it, in a couple of weeks, I will get over a thousand euros. Money that although it is technically mine, I had never considered so. So, in fact they are paying me my holidays, or a new computer.
A good reason to do that on a slow Sunday afternoon, and start planning what to do ith the money? No, it seems, as the deadline (after two months) looms close, and only a few days ago did I fill the draft (using the program they supply). Now I only have to pass the corrected draft to paper. Twenty minutes at most. Not yet. I am procrastinating. Writing on the internet instead of getting money.
Well, that could mean I do not really need money. Although more or less true at the day to day level, it certainly is not when we pass into the realm of big purchases, serious consumerism. And that money could afford me some attractive toys. Or pay this year's Amazon tab.
I do not know. I will finish now, to see if I find a pen to stop this circus. But I am sure I will do the same next year.
¶ 9:38 AM 0 comments
26.6.04
Hair care
Today I had my hair cut. It is not that I care much about my hair. We live in a state of uneasy truce, since I am aware of it. Now that we are both older and weaker, things have settled in a pleasant routine, but how painful were things at a time, when I was young.
I have curly dark brown hair, with very thick individual hairs, and quite strong. Well, less strong and less thick now, but at least the white hairs look healthy enough, so I still hope to get a white mop of hair. And it refuses to be molded, bent or glued. My first attempts to slick it down gave involuntary rise to the first case of hedgehog style in my school. It can be coaxed to be parted (on the side, never on the middle) but that will never last longer than 20 minutes. So once I had control of my hair's destiny, it was, straight back, no frills. Despite what I said earlier, there are two times when I like my hair. Just cut, that I like quite short, it cannot curl, so it has this brush texture, and due to the individual thickness, a real brushing effect. It does not last long, but it is a pleasant tactile impression.
But I do not like it enough to cut it every week, specially because then I would mean the mad scientist/semi Afro effect. When it is getting long, really long (six to eight weeks after the last cut), it starts making this halo effect around my face, that besides making me an inch taller, remind me of Einstein, and I feel makes my head look smaller. When it is clean and dry, it is very sensitive to static charges, and I can get a real Afro spherical effect. However it is a chore to wash it, and it is too hot, so I usually do not let it grow too much. Specially because almost all the people around me start with the "you need a haircut" phrase. Even internet friends tell me so, so maybe I am mistaken in my appraisal...
Today I went to my old barber, the one I have been going for 25 years. Two of the three are still the same people that when I started. Those were the days, when the hair was still extremely thick, and you could stuff a couple of pillows with what came from my head. I do not live in that quarter any more, and I have been going to an unisex hairdresser who is always full, and I have been unable this last week to get a place. So today I went, they were empty (as usual early on a saturday morning) and with just a nod and "the usual", things get underway. The same haircut for 25 years, with an exception during military service (shorter all the time) and a couple of weddings (including mine) where I asked them to cut less...
Barber's here still are the established gossip centers of the quarter. But I have always been a silent subject. Not that they mind. As they know me, and know that I do not care, they talk among themselves and with the other customers. Because, following the principle of the full seat, as soon as I sat down, the shop filled up.
So now I have learnt much more than I really wanted about the lives of a couple of people, one of whom was not even there. And made a small trip down the memory lane. I feel younger today.
¶ 12:02 PM 0 comments
Today I had my hair cut. It is not that I care much about my hair. We live in a state of uneasy truce, since I am aware of it. Now that we are both older and weaker, things have settled in a pleasant routine, but how painful were things at a time, when I was young.
I have curly dark brown hair, with very thick individual hairs, and quite strong. Well, less strong and less thick now, but at least the white hairs look healthy enough, so I still hope to get a white mop of hair. And it refuses to be molded, bent or glued. My first attempts to slick it down gave involuntary rise to the first case of hedgehog style in my school. It can be coaxed to be parted (on the side, never on the middle) but that will never last longer than 20 minutes. So once I had control of my hair's destiny, it was, straight back, no frills. Despite what I said earlier, there are two times when I like my hair. Just cut, that I like quite short, it cannot curl, so it has this brush texture, and due to the individual thickness, a real brushing effect. It does not last long, but it is a pleasant tactile impression.
But I do not like it enough to cut it every week, specially because then I would mean the mad scientist/semi Afro effect. When it is getting long, really long (six to eight weeks after the last cut), it starts making this halo effect around my face, that besides making me an inch taller, remind me of Einstein, and I feel makes my head look smaller. When it is clean and dry, it is very sensitive to static charges, and I can get a real Afro spherical effect. However it is a chore to wash it, and it is too hot, so I usually do not let it grow too much. Specially because almost all the people around me start with the "you need a haircut" phrase. Even internet friends tell me so, so maybe I am mistaken in my appraisal...
Today I went to my old barber, the one I have been going for 25 years. Two of the three are still the same people that when I started. Those were the days, when the hair was still extremely thick, and you could stuff a couple of pillows with what came from my head. I do not live in that quarter any more, and I have been going to an unisex hairdresser who is always full, and I have been unable this last week to get a place. So today I went, they were empty (as usual early on a saturday morning) and with just a nod and "the usual", things get underway. The same haircut for 25 years, with an exception during military service (shorter all the time) and a couple of weddings (including mine) where I asked them to cut less...
Barber's here still are the established gossip centers of the quarter. But I have always been a silent subject. Not that they mind. As they know me, and know that I do not care, they talk among themselves and with the other customers. Because, following the principle of the full seat, as soon as I sat down, the shop filled up.
So now I have learnt much more than I really wanted about the lives of a couple of people, one of whom was not even there. And made a small trip down the memory lane. I feel younger today.
¶ 12:02 PM 0 comments
25.6.04
I hate myself
at times. Today I was at a political act. My boss wanted me to be there, to thank for all the money our good relationship with the local government has brought the company. For those of you who do not know me (yes, right, and that is why I write in English instead of Spanish), I work for a small chemical company, threading a thin line between principles and keeping a job I like most of the time.
So, here I am, ready to listen to self promoting speeches, a few, well chosen project leaders (thanks the unexistent gods that our goals were modest and the results, while good, little understandable for outsiders), chanting the virtues of our current crop of politicians, and public money going in a sizable fraction down the rain.
And I am an collaborator. I let them think they truly have the support of small private enterprises, while we only want their money. Better used in us that spent in food and parties. Or the same old researchers churning the same article for nth time.
Nevertheless, even if I value my work better than what most public researchers do, and after all that is why I left my post in the queue at the tenure track, that does not mean my hands are clean. Did I spend the money they gave as I should? Well, no. And a project between different companies needs that excellent social lubricant, good food with good wine. And maybe we exaggerated the difficulties of the project, and we had one of the successes already in hand before we started... But they chose our project because it was likely to succeed, so maybe they also knew we would deliver. Although I am sure it was the title what clinched it. Add environment, practical and some technical term (tyre, abrasion...) and the right buzz word, fuel savings, and the money falls like manna from heaven. Pity my boss did not agree before the publication of the chosen projects to give me 10% as a bonus. I could have visited Japan again in holidays.
And I could have taken my conscience on holidays too.
¶ 9:26 PM 0 comments
at times. Today I was at a political act. My boss wanted me to be there, to thank for all the money our good relationship with the local government has brought the company. For those of you who do not know me (yes, right, and that is why I write in English instead of Spanish), I work for a small chemical company, threading a thin line between principles and keeping a job I like most of the time.
So, here I am, ready to listen to self promoting speeches, a few, well chosen project leaders (thanks the unexistent gods that our goals were modest and the results, while good, little understandable for outsiders), chanting the virtues of our current crop of politicians, and public money going in a sizable fraction down the rain.
And I am an collaborator. I let them think they truly have the support of small private enterprises, while we only want their money. Better used in us that spent in food and parties. Or the same old researchers churning the same article for nth time.
Nevertheless, even if I value my work better than what most public researchers do, and after all that is why I left my post in the queue at the tenure track, that does not mean my hands are clean. Did I spend the money they gave as I should? Well, no. And a project between different companies needs that excellent social lubricant, good food with good wine. And maybe we exaggerated the difficulties of the project, and we had one of the successes already in hand before we started... But they chose our project because it was likely to succeed, so maybe they also knew we would deliver. Although I am sure it was the title what clinched it. Add environment, practical and some technical term (tyre, abrasion...) and the right buzz word, fuel savings, and the money falls like manna from heaven. Pity my boss did not agree before the publication of the chosen projects to give me 10% as a bonus. I could have visited Japan again in holidays.
And I could have taken my conscience on holidays too.
¶ 9:26 PM 0 comments
24.6.04
Secrets
I wonder why I feel this urge to unload my most personal secrets here, where anyone could possibly see them. Maybe that is the charm of Diaries, one way to stop the secret being so secret.
But I will resist, for now, the urge. So here we go towards less interesting areas.
Recent book I liked:
City of saints and madmen.
Maybe too referential, and many of the homages and winks are too obvious, but the amount of work and love poured into this book is staggering. And I have a weak spot for meta-books. The AppendiX is specially good, and shows a great care for the formal aspects of editing.
So if you want a good adult fantasy, dealing with some dark ghosts of the psyche, and you do not mind having to think at times, this is a book for you. There are only some winks to Magic Realism, but this follows more Kafka and Peake's traditions. Not to forget Poe and Borges.
¶ 5:33 PM 0 comments
I wonder why I feel this urge to unload my most personal secrets here, where anyone could possibly see them. Maybe that is the charm of Diaries, one way to stop the secret being so secret.
But I will resist, for now, the urge. So here we go towards less interesting areas.
Recent book I liked:
City of saints and madmen.
Maybe too referential, and many of the homages and winks are too obvious, but the amount of work and love poured into this book is staggering. And I have a weak spot for meta-books. The AppendiX is specially good, and shows a great care for the formal aspects of editing.
So if you want a good adult fantasy, dealing with some dark ghosts of the psyche, and you do not mind having to think at times, this is a book for you. There are only some winks to Magic Realism, but this follows more Kafka and Peake's traditions. Not to forget Poe and Borges.
¶ 5:33 PM 0 comments
Restart
So, I am reusing this old place holder for readings of William Gibson's Pattern Recognition, to become a place to vent my spleen, and just talk to myself. I wonder how long will it take to someone I know to stumble on this. I suppose it will be the same day I disgrace myself here.
I do not intend to link to anyone, as I already have the links, and this is more of a private self-censored diary. So, any lurkers, just copy and paste.
First serious recommendation, what brought me here (but that is another story for another day):
http://www.williamgibsonbooks.com/ ¶ 5:17 PM 0 comments
So, I am reusing this old place holder for readings of William Gibson's Pattern Recognition, to become a place to vent my spleen, and just talk to myself. I wonder how long will it take to someone I know to stumble on this. I suppose it will be the same day I disgrace myself here.
I do not intend to link to anyone, as I already have the links, and this is more of a private self-censored diary. So, any lurkers, just copy and paste.
First serious recommendation, what brought me here (but that is another story for another day):
http://www.williamgibsonbooks.com/ ¶ 5:17 PM 0 comments
